Woman super-glued to toilet seat in Wal-Mart bathroom

It’s never good news when a trip to the bathroom ends with a call to the EMS. An unnamed Kentucky woman spent an hour in a Wal-Mart stall after being super-glued to the toilet seat. Emergency personnel had to unstick her but, , not before everyone in little Monticello (population: 6,188) had heard about her pee-dicament. (This is why we always use those paper seat covers.) The cops are investigating and, though they don’t blame the victim, they raised their collective eyebrows over her story because of ” the simple fact that super-glue is very fast drying,” as Chief Ralph Miniard explained. “If it had been there that long, it wouldn’t have stuck.”